To Think About

If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will change your life mightily. ~Gerald Good

Friday, April 1, 2011

Why do People Assume so Much?,

This morning I caught up with a colleague who, while not exactly a friend, I enjoy spending time with and with whom I share many views. She was married three weeks ago after many years of self-imposed singledom. She's beautiful both inside and out, she's focussed on her successful career, she has friends a plenty. And she always said she would stay single.
And then she found a love strong enough to change her mind and she is happy as happy can be.

But on her wedding day friends told her that they were so glad she was finally married - that they had been worried about her, that they didn't really feel she was going to be happy till she found a husband. She told me she paused and wondered how argumentative about such a topic it was prudent to be on one's wedding day, and chose to say nothing.

My question is this: why do so many people think that you are somehow happier when you're married than when you're single? I've been married and it wasn't the wedded bliss I had imagined and I am so much happier now that I am single again. I'm not saying that being married to the right person isn't wonderful but life can be equally as wonderful when you make your own decisions and when your space is your own.

So many girls (I don't think fellows do this so much but I could be wrong) waste so much time looking for Mr Right that they are prepared to put up with Mr Wrong rather than be alone and miss out on the very real pleasures that single life can bring. I say embrace the life you have now and let whatever will be be!

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Finding peace within

This year I have started learning yoga - 'practising' they like to call it. I go to a well-attended class on Thursday late afternoon - a break between work and home. A halt, a suspension. 

When we arrive, we find a mat and bolsters and we lie in a knees akimbo style on our backs and prepare our bodies and minds for the work ahead. I fidget, I scratch. My mind races. I think about my day and what still needs to be done. I am conscious of my fat stomach. I keep my eyes closed to gain a sense of perspective and inward thinking but really what I want to do is check other people out...always curious!

And then our calm and talented teacher makes a start and for the next hour or so, she demands concentration and perfection. Who knew there were muscles there?
As the session progresses I become oblivious to the others in the room and think only of myself - what is my body doing? How is my breath helping? Can I release any tension I'm feeling?

And at the end we lie once again on our backs to relax - legs straight this time and I am still. My mind is at peace, my body too. I walk out with new found energy and a spring in my step. Pure bliss.

ps When I say I am oblivious to the others in the room that is except for the woman who invariably seems to end up right in front of me. When the instructor repeatedly says "Big toe mounds touching" why does this woman always have her feet apart? I am tempted to kick them together!

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Today I'm grateful for...

The whole point of counting your blessings each night is to concentrate on what you do have in life, not to lament about what's not working so well. That was what this blog was supposed to promote.
And so, I've come to to the realisation that I need to try it for a few days to see whether it really does pull me up by my boot straps, whether it really helps to put my head in a different spot.
Keep it simple. Focus on the positive.

  1. The weather is perfect - warm days and cool autumn nights. Lots of energy can be found on days like these.
  2. Two parents who are alive, alert, interesting and interested.
  3. Being fit and healthy - taken for granted until its taken away from us.
Simple things but in no way small.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Wake up call required!

I'm struggling at the moment - hate to admit it but I feel flat and slightly irritated with people - most people actually. What's all that about do you think? I think I'm doing an okay job of balancing work and me time - maybe the 'me time' is a bit one sided toward getting stuff done - you know the cleaning, the washing, the shopping, but I'm still practising my yoga and taking the dog for lovely walks (getting rid of a bit of aggro with that), but still I feel let down and disinterested. I don't like feeling this way. And what I've learned in life is that whining becomes tiring for the listener (sorry folks), and that no matter who is in my life, no-one is going to make me feel better about my life than yours truly.

I went to the Farmer's Market this morning, my favourite time of the week, and brought home lots of delicious fresh produce and beautiful red flowers...nothing.

I've come back from walking Maggie near the lake - restful, quiet and fresh...nothing.

I have a 3 day weekend ahead of me full of possibilities...nothing.

I'm searching for an answer - just don't know where. And I assume I'm making you frustrated with my complaining. You'll let me know won't you?

Friday, February 25, 2011

My favourite time

My very favourite time of the week is Friday late afternoon. I'm home from work and I have shaken the week off and have this wonderful feeling of time and opportunity. Two whole days that are all mine to spend as I wish. Of course the days go by in a flash and by Sunday evening I'm reflecting on all the things that I didnt get done, but that never alters I I feel the very next Friday.

So here I am late on a Friday night, and I've been pottering around doing my own thing. I'll go to bed soon relaxed and happy. Refer to yesterday's post...have I done any of those things? I've read a few chapters, I've caught up on a favourite TV show, I've blogged and I've watered, so maybe I have...but not enough.

Tomorrow morning a bike ride and then I'm going to tackle that knitting. The garden? Mmm We'll see.
But for now I'm so grateful for the possibilities the weekend holds.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Where does time go?

I want to start straight away by saying that I'm grateful today for some things I'm also going to whinge about. Let's get that out of the way first. I love that I belong to a professional association that provides me with a fresh perspective and I love that I am privileged enough to have the resources to be engaged in interesting things.

This morning I was reflecting on how tricky it is to fit everything in - I work obviously but I'm not counting that - I'm talking about my 'leisure activities'. If I were filling in an online dating profile I would say that I garden, walk, read, bike ride, dabble with the computer and practise yoga.

But the truth is that I have a garden that is half started - plenty of ideas but not enough end product, I take my dog for walks as often as we can manage and never enough, I am trying to start a knitting project but it is sitting forlornly on my couch, I belong to a book club and have a commitment to read, but have only read the first two chapters of this month's book, I have just bought my second bicycle (now that story is a whole other post about how stupid I am) but haven't ridden anywhere,  I read other people's blogs but get behind posting on my own, and I should be into my third week of yoga but I missed it today. I also play an online game with a friend (one of those multi player options that are super fun but quite silly for a woman of my age) but haven't managed that for a week and when she asked me the other day if I wanted to play, I told her I didn't have time! Where does the time go? Other people can manage to fit way more into their lives. But I always seem to be "robbing Peter to pay Paul". Where does all the time go? Share your secrets for better leisure management with me!

What kind of person actually complains about how many leisure activities she has to fit in? I'll accept any metaphorical slaps!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Alone is enough

Today I had the blissful opportunity to come home after work and talk to...nobody. I love being with people, have always done so and my job demands of me constant interactions with a wide range of personalities. This is one of the elements of the job I love so much. But it is a job of service. It requires giving to others.
Sometimes after a particularly long day, or maybe it 's because it has challenged me, there seems no better reward than having some time to retreat into my own space, into my own head. It can be quiet there, it can be forgiving. I always feel sorry for people who can't seem to enjoy being alone - I think they're missing out on something special and soul reviving.

So today I'm thankful for:
The extra coffee bought for me that I wasn't expecting.
The hastily organised bike ride to share with colleagues on the weekend
The few quiet hours I spent with myself.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Maybe I should try a different approach

What about if I don't try to write so much each day? Better to be brief and present than leave a big gaping hole...

Today was a good day, nothing remarkable to make it note worthy really, but a good day nevertheless. They're mostly good days I have to say which is why I'm so grateful all the time!

When I was running late for work, I didn't have to wait for coffee - the barista started making my familiar order as I walked into the cafe.
I had dinner with my son - yes we live in the same house but at his age he is always off doing things, so it is lovely to sit at the dining table and swap stories about our day.
And after just taking Maggie for a short walk I really appreciate this weather - warm days so that short sleeves can be worn and cold nights which requires a light blanket to sleep. It was stinking hot just a couple of weeks ago and it will be cold soon enough so for now, it's time to rejoice!

I love Mondays!

Happiness is itself a kind of gratitude.Joseph Wood Krutch

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Ashamed So Ashamed

I am a blogging disgrace. I set about to make a new post every day but that, it seems, was when I was on holidays and my head was in a different spot...a clearer spot, a spot with time to 'smell the roses'. Now I'm back at work and despite the fact that I love it, or maybe because of it, I've lost the time or maybe it's the inspiration to write. I'm still reading my favourite blogs though and a fellow blogger, I think her name is Tanya, who also set about to make daily entries is sticking to her goal - I'm a disgrace!

I work in the education field - no longer a classroom teacher but a deputy principal in a large P - 7 school (soon to reach Year 10). Education and kids are all consuming - I liken it to diving off the 10 metre platform - you can't  just dabble in the water from there - it envelopes you, takes you over - and you don't come up for air until you reach the surface. Nobody goes into teaching for the holidays (or the pay for that matter, but that's another story). Teaching is the sort of job that you think about 24/7 until the break between school years - that's the time to really breathe deeply. The rest is just an opportunity to catch your breath. Why am I telling you this? As a way of explaining what's happened to me since the school year began. No excuse I realise, but just a way of perhaps understanding.

The really odd thing is that I'm going to bed these days with not a hint of gratitude in my mind. It's not that worthy things haven't come my way, but I climb into bed and my mind is...empty. What's happening?

I have been blessed with landing in a profession I love and there's rarely a day that goes by without me recognising how fortunate I've been. How many people, I wonder, just go to work because the bills have to be paid?  Poor them...poor you.

I'm content with my life - is it perfect? I guess not. What is perfect anyway? I'm independent, I am loved and I am free. Really, what more could I ask for?

I now know that posting a blog every night while I'm working is unrealistic, but I will try to be more regular than once every three weeks. Don't give up on me!

Monday, January 31, 2011

First day back at work

I think some people would think there is seriously something wrong with me. I love my job. Really love it. Most days are long, some days are tough, but there's not a day that I don't get up happy and excited to go to work. What's the day going to bring me? Who is going to delight me? Surprise me? Disappoint me even?

Today I started back at work after 6 weeks of beautifully relaxing and lazy holidays. I've done lots of things I enjoy, and some of the jobs on my To Do list (not many but still enough not to make me feel completely hopeless) but today I returned to work and as I drove there this morning, I realised how light and happy I felt. Am I grateful for having a great job or am I grateful for having a great attitude toward my job?

I have always felt this way about my work. I think it's the people I interact with every day. 

PS just so I don't sound totally pathetic - I do have one major problem associated with work.  Once I'm there I'm inclined to forget I have a personal life - bills to pay, mail to post, phone calls to make etc - not a very efficient way of managing my grown up life. Suggestions anyone?

And another post script Its stinking hot today - not a breath of air even though its 10:48pm. Ill be glad Ive got a fan pretty soon :)

Sunday, January 30, 2011

What's Noise Got To Do With It?

Have you ever noticed the noise we live with every day? There's the good stuff like birds tweeting and rain on the roof, there's the not so close traffic noises and then right around us there's the constant sound of living - for me it's mostly talking and sounds associated with technology - TV, XBox, music and keyboard tapping. Plus often the annoying yapping of the two small dogs who live next door. And finally there's the sounds in my own head - me talking to myself I suppose or like now me saying the words in my head as I type them (tell me someone else does this?)

Today I had the joy of silence. Home alone with just the sleepy Maggie, tired after our morning walk. Sunday morning and no traffic sounds, strangely no little dog noises and most special, my head was quiet. I swear there wasn't a single solitary thought going around in there. What a gift!

Don't get me wrong - I love people and I love this modern world, but silence, real silence is such a rare thing, for me it is to be savoured and treasured.

I wonder when I will experiece it next ?

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.” — Thornton Wilder

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Saturday wonderful Saturday

What a fantastic day I've had.
For a start I finally found some energy! Yay! I've cleaned the house, been to the Farmers Market, cleaned out my fridge, washed a couple of loads and done a stack of ironing. About time - I was starting to worry that the holiday slothful me was going to stick around for ever.

Then my oldest girlfriend phoned to tell me that she and her daughter are flying from London to meet me and my daughter in May in Milan for my birthday. I'm so excited. To be having my first overseas trip at my age is a bit of an embarrassment but there's no stopping me now. I'm already starting to consider other holiday destinations - maybe not all so far from home and therefore not so expensive but we'll see.

And to cap off my day a friend took my to my first ever live basketball game. It was so exciting and so fast. I can't believe some of the size of these girls and for a non-contact sport, well let's just say there's plenty of pushing, pulling and shoving! I think I'm a convert.

So let's see...

  • energy and good health
  • the opportunity to travel or is it having something to look forward to
  • and friends - always friends
Enjoy your day people and may someone smile on you!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Hairdresser Delights

I go to the hairdresser every 6 weeks. In fact I have booked ahead for the entire of the 2011 year so I don't miss out at all. When I left my town of 25 years to make a move across the country where I didn't have a job and didn't know a soul, one of my most major concerns was whether I would find a good hairdresser. I have very straight and very thick hair which is difficult to cut well and I learned a long ago that my general feelings of wellbeing start with having a decent hair cut. Vain? Probably. Do I care? No.

And so my appointment today...

Having found the best hairdresser in the city, I know how lucky I am to be able to afford her ministrations. But do I take this good fortune for granted? Not for one minute!

We discuss what colour and style I might like to have at this moment, I'm offered a decent cup of coffee or a glass of champagne or wine on the house (well I'm sure it's hidden in hairdresser costs but it feels like it's on the house) and then she gets to work while we chat idly or if I'm left alone I catch up on some magazine reading. Then comes the best bit, the most sublime experience...I get a long and deep head massage! Pure bliss. The stresses of the day literally gurgle down the sink and when I leave the establishment I'm almost gliding on air.

My whole day's gratitudes all tied up in one trip to the hairdresser.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Happy Australia Day

Today is Australia Day - the day we celebrate white settlement. Of course there were indigenous people living here for thousands of years before that but they were not recognised...but let's not go into that here.

Australia Day is typically hot and we Aussies traditionally like to do the sorts of things that the rest of the world seem to imagine us doing...sitting around watching sport (the Australian Open and cricket), having a barbeque and downing a tinny or two.

Well I did exactly was scorching hot and I spent the day with good friends enjoying beautiful food, some lovely wine and languidly chatting while watching the tennis. And they have air conditioning which I do not so it was especially pleasurable to be inside! It was a truly great day. 

The cool change swept through at about 8:30pm and I opened wide all the windows to flush out the hot stale air. Went to bed pretty early to read and then sleep.

So my summary...I have great friends, live in a country of freedoms and traditions, and fresh air. Bliss

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


I have a wonderful family. 
Playing Trivial Pursuit until late and being teased by my children for not having any pie pieces for a very long is a special feeling.

Having a brother in law who can call me late in the afternoon and ask if I have a spare bed for even later that night reminds me that people can count on me when they need to.

And having my 82 year old father Skype me in the morning to 'see if he can' when mum was in the shower tells me that I have taught him something new which is useful to him.

I often reflect on how lucky I am to have such wonderful people in my life. Over the last few years when I've been consciously acknowledging the positives in each day, I've done a rough estimate to calculate that people make up about 80% of what I have to be thankful for (bad grammar to end in a preposition but there you have it). I've been in the midst of a pretty quiet holiday at the moment and many days I've hardly seen a soul but once I'm back at work I often consider how special people are to me.

I have a small family - parents still, one sister, her husband and my two nieces, and my own two children. Thats pretty much it. No aunties or uncles, no cousins and now no husband. A great father in law but really that's it. So they really are IMPORTANT and SPECIAL.

I know that when the shit has really hit the fan for me, these are the people on whom I can rely every time. I hope they know how treasured they are.

Monday, January 24, 2011


So much for writing every day. I haven't even returned to work yet and I've missed some that's sad. I haven't been forgetting to count my blessings each night - just not making time to write them here!

The most curious thing - the longer I've been on holidays the more lackadaisical I feel and the less I am actually achieving. What's that all about? Is it because I'm home that I feel guilty? I mean after all there's plenty to do. But if I were in some foreign land or even getting some sun and surf at the coast I wouldn't be doing jobs...
I did have to go to work today to interview potential employees - the effort of concentrating for some hours wore me out! The rest of the week is mostly mine and then its back to it, so I'd better fire up for some inspiration soon.

Over the last few days I've luxuriated in clean sheets (how much better can life be?), shared a meal and a movie with a friend who gets more special every time I'm with her, debated vigorously but not heatedly with my son while enjoying delicious prawns together, enjoyed a walk with the dog in the crisp morning air and made an interesting rosewater syrup to accompany fresh strawberries. Hey do you notice that food is figuring strongly? And I've spoken via Skype a couple of times to my aged parents who live in another state. They are getting the hang of it and their faces light up to see me or the kids.

And I have another Blog follower...Thank you.

All in all I'd say my life's been pretty darn fine - what's been happening in your life thats made you feel good?

Friday, January 21, 2011

from the mind of John F. Kennedy

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. 

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Grateful grateful!

Two people I've never met read and commented on my blog! Yippee! Thank you ladies for taking an interest. This blogging caper is an interesting thing -I find myself sharing things here that I don't tell other people. So maybe we get to know each other a little - maybe over time a lot. #1 thing to be grateful for today.

I read into the wee small hours of this morning - got to that part of a book when you just can't put it down. As a child I never read. I loved being read to but didn't like the effort of having to do it for myself. I'm so sad about that now - there's a whole world out there that as a child I should have discovered. The first book I ever really got into came straight after Year 12 and before I started university. Who knew that a book could make me weep? Last night I ended up with a scratchy face and a soggy pillow too - what bliss. And lucky that being on holidays means that I can catch up with a nap today if I need to. #2 thing that's made my world a better place today.

I love to cook. Not dinner party stuff - that's enough stress to see me going under, but everyday cooking for my family. I buy lots of cook books, I pour over recipes and buy beautiful ingredients and sometimes items that I like the sound of but don't berries for example. I happen upon some magnificent meals and am lucky enough to have family that are eager and adventurous eaters. But last night Sam and I supped on breakfast food...eggs, bacon, grilled tomato and as a treat some mashed potato. And it was DELICIOUS. Isn't it wonderful that the simplest of things can give us absolute pleasure? #3 What a beautiful day!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Oh I forgot to say..

Remember the ugly brown stain the leaking pot plant had left on my carpet? I had the carpet cleaners have a look at it on Tuesday and there's NOTHING they can do! Its rotted the fabric and is probably some breeding ground for bacteria! Yuk! $2000 the man says to replace this carpet.. I'm going to Italy in 3 months I don't have a spare $2000!! Maybe you're covered by insurance he suggests hopefully...and then adds quietly "Most people aren't"
I rang my insurance company I AM COVERED! Yippee. 

Another Day

Today I should have been full of busy-ness but I wasn't! I started my day playing World of Warcraft online with my daughter, then went to lunch with work colleagues to celebrate a birthday and came home feeling full and tired. A lie down with my book was required and  then a couple of phone calls and more playing Warcraft with my good friend from Adelaide (Yes I know you might be wondering why a couple of 50 year old women are engaged in an online adventure game  - its our form of catching up over coffee - we've been doing it for over 4 years and we love it) It does however suck up a lot of time and hours can literally sail by. The result of my day was that very little got done - certainly nothing from my holiday 'to do list'. Shame shame...

I have wonderful friends, a wonderful daughter and a house full of unfinished business! Aren't I a lucky girl?

Oh I did start the day taking Maggie for a walk. Well I try to walk, she tries to smell and widdle her way around the neighbourhood. I took a photo so you could see her at work...

Tuesday...from Thursday's perspective

Today is' family night' day - the night when my kids come together at my house for a meal. I have a son living at home with me and a daughter who has lived with her boyfriend for over two years. So that's who I'm talking about when I say 'my kids'.
I love family night - I cook often with the help of 'Ben the boyfriend' and we laugh - sometimes if Ive come home late from work or apparently when I'm sick, I can start off being snappy, but after a glass of wine, food on the table and listening to banter, I'm relaxed and happy.
Occasionally, usually at the first hints of spring, I like to go down to the lake for a barbeque. There are many lakes in this inland city of mine - all man made but I love them. After 25 years of living in the red centre of Australia, the opportunity to be near water never gets tiring. My son hates this - the barbeques are electric and slow - "Why would we go there mum when we have a perfectly good and fast barbeque here at home?" But I like to get out near the water - it makes me feel holiday like.

So tonight we met for family night at the lake for lamb chops and Italian sausages, beautiful potato salad, a yummy green salad and a bottle of sauvignon blanc. The air got cool, the family who used the barbeque before us cleaned it within an inch of its life and Sam brought his fishing line. I had a lovely night. 

So today I'm grateful for:

  • having great kids whose company I love
  • living near large bodies of water
  • casting a line out into the water and having Sam to untangle it for me
Wouldn't a couple of photos have been a nice addition to this post?

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Later that night

Mmm hard to be grateful when you're pissy at the world...kind of the point of me starting this blog hey? Even when the chips are down, there's always something to be thankful for...

  • a cool breeze through the window tonight
That's it really - pitiful hey?

Monday, January 17, 2011

Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck

I'm a grateful person I swear I am and a week ago the idea of chronicling those things that make me feel glad to be alive seemed like a good idea, an easy idea. 

Well it may be my imagination but things haven't been going so right since I started this blog - nothing earth shatteringly bad on their own but together they are giving me the pip!

Today I finished reading all 25 job applications for one position - I slightly resent having to spend time on this during my holidays but apart from this have spent the day idly pottering on the computer and reading - my 4th book for this week when I thought I really must water the pots out the front...and take those two pots inside near the front door for a really good soak and some fresh air. 

Under the orchid I found a huge brown water stain - I thought I watered sparingly and had the drip thing covered...on the carpet of course (it's a lovely match for the huge brown stain at the other end of the couch I made last week when I tipped over much looked forward to coffee.

If thats not bad enough my new $60 hose reel snapped at the handle - yes I pushed it the wrong way but its a piece of garden equipment for goodness sakes - surely it should have some toughness?

Finding things to be grateful for tonight might be a challenge. And yes I know I sound like an ungrateful cow -I'm on HOLIDAYS for heavens sake! I'll just go and pour anther glass of wine and read some more...

Sunday, January 16, 2011

How can I lose track of the days already?

It's stayed hot and the cool breeze that came in last night lost its way tonight.

I'm so appreciative of the fact that:

  • I'm still on holidays
  • I have had time to read 3 books this week
  • I have a beautiful friend Karen had celebrated birthday today
With good things come the down side as well. I'm actually at the stage in my holidays that I'm feeling guilty for not doing anything from my job list today..I did read 12 job applications though so that's something surely. Relaxing really relaxing is obviously hard for me.
And I'm of course sad that I'm not in the same state as Karen to share her birthday with her. We did play Warcraft together for about an hour though so that wasn't a bad replacement. 

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Hot Day

Its a hot Saturday evening...sticky and hot. Ive been incredibly lazy today - went to lie down and read for a while and fell into a deep deep sleep. 
Today I'm grateful for:

  • being able to buy fresh and beautiful produce at the Farmers Market
  • fantastic tasting tomatoes
  • fresh flowers

Friday, January 14, 2011

One more thought...

Only a stomach that rarely feels hungry scorns common things.  ~Horace
I guess this is saying that if we haven't had the bad days, the times we've worried or felt low, we fail to appreciate the small blessings that are bestowed upon us.

Day 4

Today I'm feeling slightly off with the world. Not much has seemed to go right so have to think carefully...
Im grateful for:

  • having a daughter who's prepared to save my bacon
  • having some savings behind me
  • my comfy bed
Hope tomorrow looks brighter. I'm off to the Farmers Market in the morning which I always love so fingers crossed!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Day 3

This is harder than I thought...I am used to doing this last thing at night when Ive turned the light off and am just about to go to sleep. What I'm doing now is going through the exercise and then committing my list to memory so I can type them here the next day. Ill try taking the laptop to bed for a while!

Anyway last night I felt grateful for:

  1. having a mum who turned 87 today and is still pretty fit and very much on the ball
  2. being on holidays
  3. having a 21 year old son who tells me he loves me before he goes to bed
I am one lucky girl!

If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.  ~Robert Quillen

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Day 2

Just about to go to bed...
Today I'm grateful for:

  1. Spending time with my daughter
  2. Being single
  3. Not living in Queensland   *I am so distressed by the suffering of the people in Queensland who are being devastated by floods. I find myself drawn to the television to see the latest reports and having to turn it off because it is so upsetting. No matter what disasters Ive seen before on TV, nothing seems worse that watching places that Ive visited being destroyed. Prayers are required now.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Day 1 Part 2

Things I'm grateful for today:
  1. The mild weather that made garden digging okay
  2. Having dinner with my kids
  3. The takeaway coffee I bought this afternoon
It's an interesting thing that as I lay in bed last night going through my day and highlighting the things that brought me good feelings, I found it hard for the first time in ages - I'm on holidays - everything should make me feel good! Is it because I know I'm putting this out there for anyone to read that my brain is filtering my selections? Watch this space!
I found this quote the other day and wondered about how true it was for me...what do you think?

Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone.  ~G.B. Stern

Monday, January 10, 2011

Day 1: 11 January 2011

About 4 years ago when my husband's depression got pretty bad, we sought the help of a professional. She told us that people suffering from depression find it difficult to compartmentalise their life - if they had a rotten day at work, then that feeling applied to their whole life - their marriage was rotten, they didn't like their house nor the way they looked etc.This rang true for my perceptions of how my husband was treating life.
The psychologist suggested a night time ritual where before we went to sleep, we should think of 3 things for which we were grateful for that day.
Now I don't know about my husband - I'm sorry to say that we separated 3 years ago, but I've been doing this nightly ritual every night for the last 4 years and I've found it to be a real eye opener about what's really important in my life.
The other day I was in a shop and saw a 'Gratitude Journal'  - a bound book that provided the space to record these daily thoughts on paper and I thought about not buying it but of making my own - putting a bit of creativity into the exercise - but in the wee small hours of last night I had the thought to record my daily gratitudes on a blog, because if just one person who is feeling low reads this and puts it into practice and feels better about things, then that's a much better idea than keeping my ideas to myself.
Now I don't suffer from depression but I have my low times of course. I am not presuming to know really what it feels like to suffer day after day, so please don't take offence. If you want to share here what you're going through that would be fine, and I'm going to keep sharing the 3 things for which I'm grateful for every day...